You see it in her eyes. That emptiness. That need for attention, affirmation and approval. Maybe you’re like me and it scares you. As those who invest in the lives of teens, what can we do to fill that deep, deep hole?
We can share the truth about the people and places they are currently looking to.
The truth is love from a guy, be it a boyfriend or even a dad, can never fill the love gap in her heart. It doesn’t matter how great the guy is, eventually she’ll see his imperfections and be let down. The love and value she’s been looking for in a touch from a boy will turn up empty. But unless she knows why, she’ll keep turning back again and again. Guys simply don’t have what it takes to fill our need for love.
Coming from a family with eight kids and a very quiet, overworked dad, I would say that my gap was pretty big!
But God. God stepped in and filled my heart with the unconditional love I was craving. He told me how He saw me, “You are altogether beautiful my darling and there is no flaw in you.” Song of Solomon 4:7 Learning young empowered me to live a life of purity. I saw myself as valuable and as a result, others did too.
I had mentors who shared this verse and many others telling me that Jesus was crazy about me. He filled the wanting; satisfied the craving.
He was the One; the one that I was looking for who could and would love perfectly, unconditionally, radically even. He is the one who fills every crevice and heals every bruise. His love is exactly what our hearts are craving for.
That girl, the one with the empty eyes, needs to know that guys were never created to fill that love gap she has. Even if she found one who desperately wanted to do that for her, he never could; not completely. Only Perfect Love can fill a heart so that she never needs to look in unhealthy means to sometimes unhealthy people.
These are truths every girl needs to know. When their hearts are full of real Love, they will be empowered with confidence leading them to make wise choices. Isn’t that what we want for them?
Is there a teen girl in your life that comes to mind as you read these thoughts? One whose eyes are empty? Who without words is screaming, “Will someone love me?”
We can tell her. We can pour Jesus’ love into her empty heart.
Lynn Cowell is a speaker and author with Proverbs 31 Ministries. Her book “His Revolutionary Love,” helps teen girls create confidence that leads to a higher self-esteem by discovering Christ’s radical, life-altering love.